Sunday, July 26, 2009

The wait.

Then the Lord said to me,
Write my answer plainly on tablets, so that a runner can carry the correct message to others.
This vision is for a future time. It describes the end, and it will be fulfilled. If it seems slow in coming, wait patiently, for it will surely take place. It will not be delayed.
Habakkuk 2:2-3

I came across this verse yesterday. It's a beautiful reminder of God's perfect timing. It reminded me of how many times have I waited for something... And about the things I'm waiting for right now.
What I realized in these words is that no matter how much I believe that MY timing is right, I need to wait upon the Lord. Looking back over my life I can testify how divine and perfect God's timing is. And yet in these days of waiting and hoping, I find myself again in a place of restlessness and fear.
The words in these verses was such a blessing to my heart because it reminded me that God has my life in His hands and even in the times when I've felt that my prayers have been unanswered, or He's forgotten about me, this verse promises that it WILL BE FULFILLED.
The catch is, like it says in the verse, the things that my heart desires for the most may be slow in coming. They may not be an instant answer. It takes patience and faith. But just because these things don't come in my timing, the promise that it will surely take place is such an assurance to my heart.
And then the end - how it will not be delayed... That's a sweet line. The point is, that God's timing isn't mine, so although these things are delayed in my timing, and the waiting may seem in vain, God's got it all worked out. He has the bigger picture, the full story from start to finish, and He is unravelling each of our stories day by day. He isn't making it up as He goes. He doesn't make mistakes. He doesn't miss a beat. He can be trusted.
I want to rest in the assurance that His ways are always higher, His story is always greater, and His timing is always perfect.
I am so thankful that His timing is never delayed.

Friday, July 17, 2009

Where the heart is.

Defined in the dictionary as: the place where one originates, permanently resides, or flourishes.
This year I've realized that home is much more than just a location or four walls and a roof.
It's a feeling deep within. A warmth. A sense of belonging. A deep comfort.
Home is where my heart is.
The unique part is that my heart isn't just in one place anymore.
This past year I've found my home in Haiti. It's been the most intense combination of emotions all jumbled together in one: love, joy and hope, struggle, loss and questions. It's been heart-wrenching and it's been full of joy. It's been overwhelming and yet I still want more. It's been a year full of both the best and worst moments of my life. It's become such an integral part of who I have and am becoming that it will always have a chapter in my life. It's the children who call me by name in distant villages. It's the new 'family' I've become a part of, and it's the blessing that comes from living alongside a people who inspire and encourage me more than I ever dreamed.
Haiti has been a catalyst of change in my life. It's altered my perspective on a lot of issues, and it's made me realize how abundantly blessed I am.
In a very short time, Haiti has captured a piece of my heart. I have found 'home' in Haiti.

And yet, this summer, I have come back 'home'.
Returning to Canada has been one of the most anticipated and refreshing moments of my whole year. It's been so freeing to to drive around this land and take in the beauty of the lush green, wide open spaces. To see the sun set in the distance... The same sunset I've watched all my years growing up in Wainfleet, it's such a heartwarming feeling. Cruising in Niagara Falls with my family and laughing at our goofy car. Reuniting with friends and catching up on all of the ups and downs of the past year... Despite the months that have come and gone, it feels like I never left. It's a place of connection for me. All year long I've held onto memories and pictures and once again I get to live these days out. I love it so much I have to pinch myself to make sure it's real. I feel so blessed to be back in the place where it all started. There is so much for me to love about this 'home'.

So this is where I find myself... I'm caught in between two beautiful places. Two parts of the world that bring me such a fullness in my heart, yet in completely different ways. It's difficult knowing that no matter where I go, there will always be a someone, somewhere or something that is missing. It's sad to think that I will have to go through life with a missing piece, but I know these pieces will unite in heaven someday.
I also find peace knowing that Jesus understands my feelings. He knew me before I was born and He created these beautiful places. He designed before the beginning of time where I would go and what I would do, and He brought me across the distance to reveal His glory and whisper His song into my heart.
And I think that's the bottom line. Home is where I find myself truly connecting to the love of Jesus, my best friend. So far in my 23 years, I have found two places that I call home. And for that, I feel very blessed. Some people search their whole lives for one home, and I've already found two. I know that this is sense of belonging that can only come from the Lord.
And the most amazing part of it is, this is only just the beginning. There are more homes for me to find. And it's not just for me, but for all of us. As we journey along our roads of life, I believe that new homes can be acquired even in the most unlikely of places, when His glory is revealed. He is the place when we find ourselves in complete awe and amazement, He is the immovable Rock, He is the familiar foothold.
As I continue to seek Jesus, I have faith that He will continue to reveal Himself in unexpected places, and in those moments, I will find myself home once more.

Friday, July 10, 2009

Back in Canada!

I am home at last!
It has been AWESOME landing in Canada in time to catch the last few nights of SonRock Bible Camp and see so many of you! It's kind of surreal to be back... I feel like I just have to keep pinching myself!
I am very excited to spend the summer in Canada - there is so much to look forward to! I'll be working part-time for my dad this summer where I'll get to spend lots of time with my family, I'm thrilled to be back and to catch up with friends, and I will also be a part of 2 weddings! My brother, Broc will be getting married at the end of August, and Amber Egerter, who is one of my best friends, is getting married on September 12th. I am planning on returning to Haiti on Tuesday, September 15th after the wedding and the tentative plan is to start the school year on the following Monday.
Amidst all of these summer plans and excitement, I am quickly realizing that despite the school year schedule and the summer vacation, a teacher's work is never done. I will be investing a lot of time this summer into planning for the new school year curriculum and my expanding student number. I appreciate your prayers as I balance my time between preparation for the fall and also making the most of my time here with family and friends.
It has been so wonderful seeing so many of you over the past few evenings at church and I look forward to re-uniting with more of you in the days and weeks to come. I will try to keep updating my blog throughout the summer with thoughts and prayer requests, although it won't be as often as my time in Haiti. Thank you for tracking with me and I look forward to touching base with you more in person over the summer months!

Saturday, July 4, 2009


I have some very exciting news to share with you from the Mission of Hope... We have two new babies that are joining the Hope House!
I am pleased to introduce you to Hannah Grace (right) and Jeremiah (left).
On June 25th, these 5-day old twins arrived at the mission after being abandoned by their 18-year old mother. They went swiftly to the clinic after their arrival to be checked over and weighed. It is a miracle that so far all of their test results have come back with good reports considering their poor prenatal care and severe underweight, Jeremiah (3.5 pounds) and Hannah (2.8 pounds). For the full story of heartbreak and hope, check out Rachel's blog.
Since the arrival of these little ones, there has been a lot of excitement and joy up in Rachel's apartment as all of the staff and interns come together to bring them from their malnourished state into good health. The twins have found their beds in two laundry baskets, and Vanessa (Brad's wife), Rachel, the interns and I have all been switching off for the night shift. Teagan and Georgie absolutely love the babies and have been a wonderful relief to us all during the day.
Even though it took me a while to grow comfortable with the tiny size of these precious babies, I have found myself growing more and more confident in holding and feeding them. It's hard for me to express in words what the past few days with them have been like... First off, it's been quite the crash course in motherhood! But, what an amazing experience to be a part of as my school commitments have ended and I am wrapping up before coming home. The timing and opportunity could not be better!
Often while I am looking after them I find myself amazed at where the Lord is taking each of us caregivers, as well as the Mission of Hope as we look after these two darlings. It's been such an opportunity to not just surround the fragility of life of these two babies, but to also surround and support each other. It's a task that would be almost impossible to do alone, and so working together as a team has been a beautiful thing. It has truly been a team effort with all of us and it's been a huge blessing and reminder for me about how we all need each other as we embrace this gift of life that the Lord has bestowed upon us.
Amidst the craze of feelings and emotions that I am feeling, and everything I need to do during my last week in Haiti, I really believe that the Lord has arranged His divine timing in bringing the twins here. Seeing these fragile lives being cared for and nurtured, and being a part of it myself has really reminded me about what serving in Haiti is all about.
This morning Jeremiah was awake for a feeding, and after he was finished I carried him outside outside to watch the sunrise. It was such a special moment for me to reflect and be thankful for these last days in Haiti and what this year is all about.
It's the miracle of life.
It's being there for one another.
It's tangible growth.
It's a bright future.
It's hope.